My experience in the palliative care world.

Palliative care means being present with patients who are suffering and facing uncertainty. There is rarely a clear way to leave those feelings behind when a visit ends. Many of us chose this field because we are sensitive to others’ needs, but this can make it easy to ignore our own needs until we feel emotionally or morally distressed. I’ve learned that my personal reactions to my work, like grief or dread before a visit, are not personal failures; they are normal reactions to doing the hard work related to serious illness.

Throughout my journey, I’ve had to unlearn the idea that I’m supposed to “push through” because I’m strong, resilient, or “built for this.” I incorporate rituals and small daily activities that bring meaning to my day.  For me, that looks like things I can actually fit into a real day, not an ideal one. In a typical week, it might mean starting my morning with gentle stretching, naming one thing that went well during my patient-facing visits, choosing to walk between visits to enjoy the sounds and sights of nature, or making time to journal so meaningful moments don’t get lost among the harder ones.​

I have also sought out structured ways to cope with the emotional weight of this work. The Center to Advance Palliative Care (CAPC) holds routine virtual meetings to support this effort. The organization describes these “well-being debriefings” as informal, peer-facilitated, small-group meetings where participants can give voice to the difficult nature of their work and discuss issues that negatively affect resiliency. CAPC notes that these peer-facilitated well-being debriefings are an evidence-based way to support health care workers, increase social support, reduce feelings of isolation, and provide opportunities to learn from one another when coping with difficult issues. According to CAPC’s facilitator materials, debriefings foster a supportive culture among colleagues and aim to validate and normalize the emotional impact of working in health care, increase social support, and decrease feelings of isolation.